Tales from the City

Cultural Lessons from the Motherland
Tale 1
Tofu Tale
I went to Sainsbury's (Supermarket) and I couldn't find the tofu anywhere so I asked a shop assistant, "excuse me, where is the tofu?". "Tofu?," she said. "Tofu", I said, thinking this was an accident of accent, which happens quite often here. "What is tofu?", she asked. "Um, it's white and made from soy beans", I told her. "Is it tinned?", she asked me. "No . . .". "Let me just ask someone else . . . Yo, Marlon, we got any tofu?". "What's tofu?". . .

How many seemingly self-evident truths in life are part of the ego's self absorption that the rest of the world is completely oblivious to?

Tale 2
Why it is tiring to live here
Microphones that can be left permanently on so as to unleash the wisdom of drivers on a morning-weary precaffine stunned public : "Ok man, wake up! Hello, Hello, Can you see the buzzer, does it look like a joystick? Can you see the stopping sign?"

Tale 3
Why it is great to live here
Crazy Nick and his musical traffic cone. I will try to get a photo sometime but we are really bad about taking our camera with us. For now you you will just have to trust me that he is a new musical genius.